What I'm wondering is: What actual work could his late nights entail? I don't mean that snarkily, either. What would the NFL commissioner be doing, in this scenario, if not meeting with the press and articulating the league's stance on this stuff? Like, is he sitting up at 12:45am writing reports or something? I… » 9/17/14 11:41am Today 11:41am

California's Endless Drought Cruelly Menaces Innocent Sushi Prices

Well, you finally did it, humans. You finally fucked up the ecosystem enough to imperil something that matters. No, not the millions of innocent human beings whose access to potable water is threatened by what appears more and more to be the end of rain- and snowfall in California. No. The sushi, dammit. The » 9/17/14 11:25am Today 11:25am

How To Make A Baked Egg--Yes, Goddammit, A Baked Egg

You say "baked egg" and people look at you like they're concerned for your wellbeing and go, "...baked egg?" And you go, "Yeah, y'know, like a shirred egg, only more Italian," and they go, "What in the damn hell is a 'shirred egg'?" And then you say, "Oh, goddammit, now I'm gonna have to write about this in my… » 9/13/14 12:30pm Saturday 12:30pm

Wall Street: Olive Garden Makes Bad Food Badly

A fight for control over Olive Garden's parent company, Darden Restaurants, has shed light on some of the Italianish restaurant chain's less-than-ideal kitchen practices. For example: Olive Garden kitchens do not salt their pasta water. For another example: Olive Garden kitchens exclusively prepare Olive Garden… » 9/12/14 11:44am Friday 11:44am

Yes, Bruce Levenson's Racist Email Was Racist

By now you're aware that Bruce Levenson, controlling owner of the Atlanta Hawks, is selling his stake in the team, at least in part because of fallout from an email he sent to other members of team management back in 2012, theorizing that the team struggles to fill its arena because "the black crowd scared away… » 9/09/14 5:05pm 9/09/14 5:05pm

We had the video of Ray Rice dragging Janay Palmer's unconscious body around outside the elevator. This video—the video of the actual punches—was known to exist, but hadn't been made public; the NFL's mouthpiece reporters (King, Schefter, et al) heavily implied that its then-unseen contents mitigated Ray Rice's guilt… » 9/08/14 7:35pm 9/08/14 7:35pm

How To Make Creamy Polenta, Which Puts The "Gruel" Back In "Grueling"

There's no way around it: Making real, from-scratch creamy polenta is a pain in the ass. Right from the jump: You have to find the right kind of cornmeal, and it's annoying; then you have to cook it for a long time, and that is also annoying; and god, what if you fuck it up, after all that, won't that just be the… » 9/06/14 10:24am 9/06/14 10:24am